Reagan devours ships like Rush Limbaugh devours bottles of Vicodin.
Reagan does not drink tea because Reagan hates British people. Reagan drank coffee once and stayed up for days, frustrated, tossing large boulders from the coast of California out to sea. And, thus, from his rage, Hawaii was born.
Sarah Palin does not turn Reagan on. But that doesn’t mean Reagan would not hit that.
Reagan paints happy little clouds, but farts angry mushroom clouds. Thankfully, Reagan only farted twice in anger— back in Japan in ‘45. Since then, he’s been kind enough to head off to desert test sites to do the deed.